This Really, Really Needs To Stop As It’s Further Endangering Me

NOTE: Some images are currently missing, but not gone.

And that endangerment is what I meant when I said that Liana’s over-the-top certainty over who I am, what I do, and why, are hurting me. They’re not hurting my precious feelings, they are hurting my credibility and placing me in further imminent danger as the person I believe is behind all of those messages is closing in during all the triangulated chaos that’s now ensued.

My Safety

I wanted my last post to be my last post, but Liana has a way of saying anything and everything until something is outrageous enough to warrant a response. I’m only responding because of my safety.

I don’t want to respond. I want out.

The fact she’s motivating me to respond out of fear for my wellbeing should tell you everything you need to know about all of this. I hope it does, but, I can’t have any expectations anymore regarding that because they don’t seem to ever materialize.

The singular claim that me writing “rotten” here constitutes a “confession of an intent to harm” is egregious enough that I feel the need to address it directly, as that’s a very serious thing to say.

Here’s EXACTLY what I said. This it. There isn’t anything missing. This is what I posted:

I have repeatedly expressed no intention to harm Liana in any tangible way that I would be responsible for. Any harm that is occurring, in Liana’s mind, is the result of her own callous indifference.

I will now describe this indifference in detail, as that’s the core of the current issue. It is mind-bogglingly terrifying to me.

In her description of my use of the word “rotten” she leaves out all of the context that short phrase finds itself ensconced with. So I’ll make it all the more clear and straightforward:

These accounts and their past behavior, in light of their recent inactivity, are what are rotten by themselves. I never desired, nor hoped for any response. I don’t need them to respond, much like I don’t need anyone to respond to me anymore, though, support is always appreciated.

These truly rotten accounts are showing something very disturbing in their absence. She leaves out “The implications are damning and obvious” because, well, it’s off-screen and few supporters will bother to check.

I’m not complaining at all about not getting a response. That’s what Liana hopes to get. I don’t. I want the responses involving me and all the things she’s absolutely certain I am, I do, and why, to stop.

They need to stop.

This isn’t a “boundary,” or an opinion, or a moral stance. This has gone far beyond words on a screen or a pseudo-political scandal for me. This is a desperate call for her, or anyone, to be concerned about the very real danger I’m facing. A very real danger Liana has known about in detail this entire time.

When I write “rotten,” I’m clearly observing that these account’s absence calls into question their very existence, and who is truly behind them, because they’re silence speaks towards an interest being protected that shouldn’t be present if they really were the people they said they were.

That’s what’s rotten.

But note that’s not what she recounts. It’s very skewed in a particular direction, as if she’s trying to pin a confession on to me that I never made. Much like how she has attempted to ascribe potentially criminal actions to me that I never engaged in.

That’s how narrative abuse works.

I have never intended to harm Liana, I don’t believe I have harmed Liana in a tangible manner beyond simply stating the truth, I have never stated or confessed an intent to harm Liana in public or private, and this type of language is what has brought us to this point in the first place.

Apparently, even after stating my very real boundaries emphatically, she completely stomps all over them (the true quote) while I’m also being accused of “harassment” for selectively ignoring others’ boundaries I’m not responsible for. Either we all have boundaries, or we don’t. She has repeatedly condemned ‘tit for tat,’ and yet, if the justification is that I didn’t do it for others, then, well, that’s ‘tit for tat.’

This is something I’ve watched Liana do for 17 months now. She’ll state anything and everything to see if it will elicit a response so the whole “drama” needlessly continues. That’s the true job. That’s the goal. It’s the nature of the industry, by default, that she’s been in for years. This is profoundly antithetical to the incentives a Peer Counselor and mental health journalist should have.

I have already made my case, and I have been proven correct. The next four months are going up now and will further show the true character of the events she’s egregiously misrepresented for over a year, all to the severe detriment of my credibility.

Liana’s way, and retelling, was wrong, and mine was right. It’s pretty much a fact now, one she keeps avoiding.

Anyways, from now on, anything this egregious will simply be clarified and denied in as few words as possible, because it’s a waste of my now productive time otherwise. I do it only because I’m afraid and in danger: because a sentence/claim like this finding any purchase further endangers me and my credibility when I didn’t even make that “complaint” in the first place.

The truth regarding my situation is very straightforward, and I’ll repeat it as simply as possible, despite it’s verbosity, one last time. Consider this a statement I might make to the police, and one I may very well end up making:

This is going too far. To *my* knowledge, which *is* limited, Liana Kerzner does not face the same danger I am facing. She claims to have a “stalker,” yes, but, as I was saying, where are they?

Where are all these people and accounts that have hounded her for so long?

I’ve already written about this at length, so I’ll be republishing that. The gist is that these accounts are always so garbled, so messy, and so incompetent that the scandal and controversy always remain “safe.” Note what happens when the safe bounds of “drama” are crossed?

And it’s Liana who is now crossing them with disregard for me or reality.

From as far as I can tell, and why I called it “punching down,” Liana enjoys a far larger social and economic cushion than I, and the one I might possibly enjoy is being shrunk at an increasing rate by her, frankly, outrageous and bizarre claims and misrepresentations. I now firmly believe that is the point, at this point. I am to be placed in so much danger that I will give up, “preserve my peace,” and walk away without accomplishing any defense or gaining back any restitution.

This is not what is going to happen, as it is profoundly unfair for me to have to be placed in so much danger in the first place. Note that when Liana is facing her own kind of threat to her cushion that suddenly the tone changes to everything being serious, almost deadly, when all along, any indication of that from me was mocked.

Perhaps, then, in the face of these truths coming to light, she might learn something from how this feels, and not by my hand. It’s because the truth is becoming known and her lies are being proven false all along. And regardless of right or wrong, it hurts to no longer be believed.

I should know.

The fact is, though, that I am much closer to being imprisoned, either in a jail, or in an institution, or even rendered economically bereft, than Liana is by a long shot. She lives in a house, she has mortgages to pull from when things go awry, she’s very visible socially and is quite connected, and in some circles, her statements are taken at face value, no question.

I enjoy none of these things, and thus, I am in danger.

At this point whatever grievance *I* have is not about the game. It’s not about my feelings. It’s not about Liana’s rejection or approval. It’s not about her cruel treatment of me in the final exchange. Those are all subjective opinions that are now settled as far as I’m concerned. And thus, it’s not about hurting anyone, getting revenge, being angry over an insignificant slight or at being called out, or guilt goddammit.

This is the scope, and basis, of *my* very specific and persistent grievance with Liana, and my concern over what she is doing.

It’s a series of very factual, very clear events:

Liana became my friend six years ago through my husband becoming online friends with her through her web series. All three of us grew close to varying degrees, my husband being closer to her than I was. I have few friends I’m frequently in contact with. By the end of our relationship I was talking to Liana pretty much every day online. I considered her my closest friend at that time.

At the beginning of the friendship I disclosed my mental health struggles, my condition, and more importantly, my moral and social philosophy, which is on full display right now, complete with how I deal with things and what often occurs. Some of this is in the transcripts (I don’t know why that’s in quotes). None of what has occurred should have been a surprise unless Liana simply didn’t believe me. She has stated she didn’t believe me despite expressing at PAX, in person, that she resonated with my ideas, my judgment, and my viewpoint. From then on, this is what I understood to be true until the final exchange.

Over the course of our five year friendship we talked about an individual named Louis Michael Cseke that my husband and I encountered just before committing to being friends with Liana beyond a parasocial relationship. He was in a local film group and at first went by “Mario Mattei.” Mr. Cseke since then has exhibited and engaged in very frightening and manipulative behavior since then towards me after I took back two books I loaned him.

He has had nothing but vitriol for the two of us, and continues to triangulate in extreme ways much like he did in the group we were in. We cut ties and have never spoken directly with him again. I am not afraid of this person, who I call Michael, themselves, but I am afraid of what he’s able to influence other people to do.

Liana and I discussed this individual, and his various online impersonations and negative activities towards me in detail over the course of five years, with Liana displaying familiarity after the second mention or so with their name and situation. This is shown in the uploaded transcripts. I have compiled a list of each discussion with links you can follow to the exact place it occurred (minus those yet to be published).

I previously told Liana I was afraid of Louis Michael Cseke, someone I knew in real life and who lived near me, multiple times:

• Once on April 21, 2019 here and here;
• Once in 2020;
• Three times in 2021 on January 2, April 30, and July 2;
• Eight times in 2023 on April 13, 14, 15, 16, 19, 24, 28, May 18, and July 24;
• And once, as is so far published, in 2024 on May 5; And four more times not yet published on June 14, 22, July 12, and 13.

This is a total of 19 discussions and 30+ mentions in regards to Michael over the course of five years.

I also have tens of thousands of screenshots detailing lots of things over the course of the last 17 months.

When the friendship between Liana and I ended, Michael showed up in the comments, once again berating us in his very signature style. We confronted him and the comment disappeared.

After that he showed up very obviously as an account on BlueSky that changed names, first masquerading as a Canadian furry and encouraging Liana to pursue a protection order to which she declined as it was just “Internet speech,” which, is just speech.

That account changed to another name, “yumtacular” and was impersonating a recipe and lifestyle website. That account engaged with me directly, which, at this point, I was not blocking so that I could be fully aware of whoever was “in play” and who might *want* to contact me, which, I was. At first I accused this account of being my husband’s harasser, Giancarlo (who originated from Liana’s community), because it was unclear who was who in the early stages. It is not so unclear any longer after my own research into it.

After a very negative interaction, in which Michael, presumably, attempted to shame me in his signature style (though, with slight alterations), the account was suspended. We had reported the impersonation to the website, and the website then most likely reported it to BlueSky.

He then changed his focus with a new account that constantly changed names. The new focus was on targeting me specifically, all in response to, and a further follow through, a post Liana had made to Annie Gallagher that claimed I wrote distasteful things in a post that I factually did not write.

He put up graphics talking about “hunting seasons,” accusing me of increasingly narrower degrees of pedophilia and confessing to assault, especially after I asked him to show where I said what he said I said (a Kiwi Farms narrative) all the while remaining ANONYMOUS (this is our best guess given the evidence).

I only interacted with him to attempt to deescalate the accusations, which, him being local and the current culture, were increasingly putting me on edge in public.

After dissatisfaction with BlueSky emerged, he took to Kiwi Farms as drunk_as_a_wunk, targeting my husband and me once again, with outrageous claims, and grotesque graphics posted both on the board and on BlueSky that showed photographs of us, our legal names, our birthdates, and eventually our address on Kiwi Farms. I posted only twice more on that wretched website in defense against this targeted harassment that was putting me in real life danger.

I expressed that I was in danger, twice, and was summarily ignored by Liana and friends, who even said, “Good riddance” when my account disappeared.

Throughout this, we believe Michael (otherwise the malicious actor) would truly harass anyone I came in contact with online, particularly women, by sending them what I’ve understood to be incredibly disturbing online ANONYMOUS messages. I have never sent such messages before, during, or after. I have no need to do so and no motivation as I would not enjoy the societal cushion in defense I would need to defend myself. It would endanger me, which, is exactly what it is doing by proxy.

After Liana posted on her BlueSky that she received an ANONYMOUS veiled threat through her contact form she sent a “lawyer’s letter” to us via e-mail from her counsel Dr. Mark Bourrie. Dr. Mark Bourrie treated me with obvious disdain and contempt, communicating in a derogatory, flippant, and even offensive manner devoid of all professionalism, and I quickly ceased all communications.

Since then, it *appears* to me that Dr. Bourrie has abandoned the pursuit after I posted the evidence above showing Liana’s direct knowledge and then listed her subsequent actions, just as I am doing here. For once, I can describe this as a wise decision.

She paints our activity as being in rabid indignation at the insult, but that is not reality. The reality is our response mirrored the beginning of a very dangerous narrative, at least to me: that I was truly behind these messages.

I knew this because I was informed by a concerned individual that she told her Discord this very thing. Her Discord is near-public despite being paywalled, with messages showing up on random, but established, troll accounts out of the blue that seemingly have nothing to do with the situation. That’s not “private” to me, but nevertheless it is not a space I’m actually in nor am I “monitoring” it.

Possessing the knowledge that she is pinning this person’s activities on me, we responded as anyone might do: in defense and denial. This is part and parcel of conflict with Liana, as it has become clear *to me* that this was the beginning of a high stakes escalation. One which she could turn into protracted content and sympathy.

This false certainty, since they are ANONYMOUS messages by design and she currently cannot know who they are from, was further reinforced in her continuing weekly content in many various ways, where I was already cast as a nonsensically aggressive friend who treated her, and her pushbacks, quite poorly.

I have always denied this, stating that there were no pushbacks at all, but it has only been recognized after publishing the chat itself, so… I guess that’s what I had to do. It was my choice nevertheless.

It finally crossed a very unethical line, due to the ramifications, when she broadcast an ANONYMOUS message on her radio show, quickly glossing over the fact it’s ANONYMOUS, though she did mention it, and putting it on either me or my husband having sent it (without naming names) complete with it’s contents and the ridiculousness of its contents.

… except, of course, when it’s used to benefit Liana as “my” video is currently the most viewed video on her YouTube outlet.

The contents of the ANONYMOUS message are ridiculous, but it offers no insight into us because it’s not from us.

Removal Of My Exploitation

I’ve requested removal of just my interview three times, twice publicly, and once to her counsel (below). I’ve only been met with condescension and invitations to describe how it’s false. I’ve also said why, and of course, it directly contradicts Liana’s narrative abuse.

Here is the direct contradiction. Liana Kerzner has imputed the opposite motivations onto me, much like the alleged “confession” above:

This indicated an extreme that I thought Liana would never go to, but she did so with such callous disregard that I became quite concerned. It’s not the contents of the message that matters. And it’s not whether she named us that matters.

What matters is the increasingly public reinforcements of a false narrative that ties me to discrediting and potentially criminal activities in an effort to further discredit me with no regards for my safety or well being.

Here is how Liana Kerzner described that episode to her Patreon subscribers when my chat logs began to gain some attention:

To our well researched knowledge Louis Michael Cseke continues to reside in our hometown of Fort Collins. This is a man we had to go the police over and knew in person. This is someone who could easily go to the library next to our apartment (somewhere I *never* go) and send a message in an attempt to make it look like it was likely me. This is someone who has proactively besmirched anyone in his way, such as his step-son, at great length to the police when he wasn’t even involved in the incident that occurred, and who name drops or suggests further follow through with those in charge.

In our last encounter he told us he was going to make a report to the police because we repeatedly demanded my books back from him. A report consisting of what?

We stayed up all night so we could walk in the police station the second it opened so that we could speak first, as I am fully aware what a diagnosis like mine can mean for me when encountered as the follow up story.

Liana Kerzner has been aware of this, including the bizarre text conversation (screenshots shared with her on April 19, 2023 and republished here), as early as April of 2019 (specifically April 21, 2019), and I mentioned this specific detail again, 4 years later, on April 15, 2023.

It’s already happened to me once.

I know I’m contentious, spiky, and not everyone’s cup of tea, but that doesn’t mean I’m not telling you the truth as it is.

This is the man who is most likely behind the message Liana read on the radio with neither worry nor care, but in a mocking fashion, as I listened to another blatant very public reinforcement that I was responsible for Michael’s presumed actions.

I was horrified.

Again, I told Liana multiple times over the last six years, both before and after our friendship (in public), that I was afraid someone like Michael would attempt to frame me for a crime or set me up to encounter social danger or abuse. After the cancellation my husband made a video where he emphatically informed everyone of this person (below), which, given what we talked about, should’ve been a *reminder* to Liana about who was most likely behind these messages.

She feigned ignorance, in my opinion, to her Discord server about it, stating, “I don’t understand why they don’t get the hell off kiwi farms. Apparently there’s a second guy now. “Mario”. That’s in the 56 minute video. How I was supposed to know this, no idea.“

Well, Liana, because I told you all about him and my fears regarding him, repeatedly, for five years, that’s how.

Also, I’m not “on” Kiwi Farms. I was never “on” or participating on Kiwi Farms. I don’t visit there for entertainment or relevant information beyond this crap. I don’t care about Kiwi Farms beyond their potential danger to me, through individuals like Liana who quite blatantly lay out the role Kiwi Farms is meant to perform in people’s lives who are supposed to be scared of them:

The radio broadcast was actually *after* all of this, after the doxxing, after the the public harassment towards me, after the signals of danger, after Liana acknowledged I was being hounded by trolls (whether I take the bait or not) much like the individual she flings out there as my victim for the very same reason, after my husband emphatically warned everyone of the danger I was in and who was most likely responsible for the escalations.

She broadast that seemingly innocuous message on the radio *after* all of that, reasonably knowing the entire time who was behind it.

And even after that incredibly bizarre episode, where the manipulative triangulation by a third party in an escalating conflict was used as fodder to fill air time complete with laughs and giggles, Michael once again showed up (presumably) on my website to chastise me for focusing on Audrey and Saige’s also escalating rhetoric concerning my effects on them. The troll account, dubbing itself the “real Jeffrey Epstein” was linked to VPNs, but just once, in mining the traffic patterns, it was determined to be a local IP as far as we can tell.

Who would’ve guessed?

This is why I keep and analyze my traffic data for now. It is once again for my safety, as opposed to some megalomaniacal power play. You think I *want* to trudge through server logs? Have you ever done that with minimal tools? No thanks.

And this troll account insisted that, while Audrey and Saige’s rhetoric may be “cringe,” since Audrey was looking for sympathy (in my view) for being a victim of not being a victim at this point, I’m, by definition “10 times cringier” for even reacting to it.

And while this is a maniacal, and ridiculous troll, yes, as Liana said, it does serve as a barometer of vulnerability. And thus my credibility and legitimacy has been regarded in general as always lesser, and always at fault; always wrong, and always despicable. I might as well not exist on the Internet, as, I don’t deserve the same things other people obviously receive.

This is not just in my head at this point. This is factually demonstrated every time Liana’s asymmetrical behavior is supported and reinforced.

She is now saying a lot of things I was saying 7-10 months ago. The only difference is that my account was permanently suspended, and I ended up permanently suspended across every major atproto app.bsky.* platform for now.

My husband was suspended, not for being angry and scary as far as *we* can tell (Liana has a very strange, near nonsensical way of interpreting what people write when it’s convenient), but for positing that TransTruthTeller wasn’t who she said she was using the best evidence we can produce.

Liana has called this evidence manufactured, photoshopped, fake, a “false reality,” and I’m sure, she’s indicated to many the danger I’m facing is the same.

It is not.

But, who will believe someone who doesn’t even deserve to be on the Internet, lest he simply harass more women?

This is the result of stigma. This is literally stigma in action. Liana denies this, publishing a video where she expresses indignation at the accusation she engages in mental health stigma after defining it so broadly it loses all meaning. At least, it loses the meaning that I learned when I read one of the seminal books on the phenomenon known as stigma, that of the spoiled identity, 24 years ago.

It wasn’t until I finally published the chat logs did she admit that it was most likely the Kiwi Farmers all along, and in that case, she was closing off her contact form ‘to preserve’ my dignity for her own sense of humanity. I never cared about the contact form, since I never had access to the messages. I only knew of them because she kept talking about them publicly, as if I was sending them. Going so far as to state that I was sending them.

I published the chat logs after the radio broadcast. It wasn’t to “get back” at anyone. It was a decision I made for my own safety; one that Liana scoffs at, insinuates I’ve oversold as I do my trauma, and pretends doesn’t exist nor is she responsible for it.

What this amounts to is someone who knew of a serious danger and fear in the life of an at-risk and disabled adult and proactively escalated that danger and fear in order to further discredit him, which also increases the likelihood that he will face further abuse without recourse.

These terms of “at-risk” and “disabled” are not self-diagnoses or self-assigned.

My mother is also my “guarantor” to manage my financial decisions, as a 43-year-old man.

Jesus Christ, people, this is a thing, it’s real, it’s not a show.

I have been determined by the state to be legally disabled, and if my husband didn’t have income, I’d receive benefits. I have been determined by hospital staff and social workers to be “at-risk” after a couple extreme hospitalizations, where they warned me of the dangers of such. It was quite eye opening and sobering. I didn’t pull these from thin air for pity or cred.

Who’d actually *want* to do that when it’s very very real?

Who *wants* to tell people they’re vulnerable just so they’ll take you seriously?

I reiterate:

Liana Kerzner knew of an imminent threat to my safety and well-being and employed that knowledge to take advantage of a triangulation tactic by said threatening actor. In doing so it is reasonable to believe that she knowingly crafted an increasingly escalating very public narrative in a continuing effort to discredit me to the public due to my very public grievances of her lying about me in her cancellation video (which she did).

Outside of the death threat, the contents of the messages are not important. What’s important is that everyone is led to believe *I* sent them. This is how someone like me is set up to either be convicted, or institutionalized.

That you’re not in danger of this is no reflection on the reality that I am.

Her actions clearly demonstrate, in my purely laymen’s opinion, a depraved indifference towards the safety and wellbeing of someone less capable in deference of her own comfort and profit.

This is why, in my very reasonable opinion, Liana Kerzner is dangerous to those with mental illnesses and other stigma. When a conflict arises with people who are prone to conflict due to their more extreme behaviors, her go to is to act like an important public television star complete with narrative abuse tactics from the late 90s and 2000s, rather than simply resolve them amicably and without major consequence.

It has nothing to do with her gender, or her failed project, or her online demeanor, or her arguments, or a hate-boner, or any of that. The facts are clear to me, and should be to anyone else, and that’s all this is about.

She endangered me, her former friend, because she knew I was vulnerable and a good destination to dump her failures. This is an observation from her behavior alone, not her intentions, as they are irrelevant in this.

Her intentions don’t determine my safety.

And she knew I was a prime target as she herself told me that Kiwi Farms served as a barometer of who’s the most vulnerable.

That would be me, and Liana “took the bait” to make sure of it.

She cannot continue to do this. Individuals who hold the disabled and less fortunate as people to protect and value cannot ethically stand by and watch this simply fall out until someone’s physically, financially, or socially injured. It may seem like a far cry from reality, but it is absolutely in the realm of possibility when dealing with individuals like Michael, who do things most wouldn’t, that I could end up dead or missing.

And what’s worse, Liana’s not alone. She has discussed, with much enthusiasm, that this style of Peer Support is the future of mental health.

It is not, unless we, as a society, and as the mentally ill, are willing to simply sweep those less fortunate under the rug of tabloid sensationalism. Lolcow LLC and other such forums are a far cry from the generally safe environs of a controlled environment designed to support those in crisis. If Liana Kerzner is the future, then Lolcow LLC (or whatever owns Kiwi Farms) might as well open a hospital of their own: a reality TV show that laughs at all of us and gives us a cut of the money.

Such knowing depravity cannot continue.

It must be challenged, critiqued, and stopped.

If this continues unabated, I will finally feel the need to go to the police and involve the authorities. I have put off doing so because I don’t have anything tangible to link Michael to this activity.

My husband and I implored others in this situation to send us the information regarding the messages they received so that we might have a chance of having something we could go to the police with. Everyone we’ve publicly requested this from ignored our pleas, and instead chose to continue deriding us, putting us down, calling me entitled, and framing everything I do as some form of criminal activity “if it wasn’t online,” which… what would it even be?

Such statements are emotional, but devoid of any real substance.

But who’s going to notice in the midst of all the exciting “drama”?

Who’s going to actually remember the facts when they seem so boring, convoluted, take up too much time, and only show the ever present guilt and obsessiveness that apparently everyone has all the time?

With that information we could’ve gone to the police and started an investigation into Michael and potentially obtained our own protective order, but, seeing as how no one deigned to give us it out of any sort of concern, we weren’t able to do that.

Instead, they read it on the radio to millions of people in order to further discredit a former friendship, the memory of which her ineffectual lawyer attempted to leverage, poorly, and place a verifiable, non-self-diagnosed, non-self-assigned, at-risk disabled individual in danger.

And so, I will most likely end up going to the police, since Liana Kerzner has showed no signs of slowing down or “pumping the brakes,” as she she uses all of this as fodder and inspiration to pump out content for her brainwashed audience.

And that’s the ENTIRE problem with her self-assigned position and self-chosen “livelihood.”

And why shouldn’t she?

After all, it seems to me, someone with Borderline Personality Disorder, making up a part of the personality she described as “awesome” (or some such), doesn’t even matter in the first place. Only the terrible effects he has on other people ever seem to matter, as that’s the only thing she’s ever talked about.

I have talked about much more concerning Liana, including concern, and positive qualities. The only positive thing Liana has ever said about us post-cancellation is that, “She really does care about these people!”

She has only talked about how “bad” I am, and how much of a “terrible” person I am from day one, not just now.

This has been a constant refrain, in so many interactions and in so many indirect words, indexical targetings, and insider allusions (reinforced, I’m sure by not only Discord, but private chats the likes she had with me), for 17 straight months.

This opinion has been present this entire time, not just after I published transcripts. It’s just that no one can easily look it up, and a rare few even care to bother in the first place.

Everything I write now is immediately reinterpreted by Liana and people believe her for some reason, or at least, that’s how it seems to me, and it’s reaching a point that it’s untenable.

With her history of being in the public eye, she is fully aware of this, or should be since she says she’s a “professional communicator,” just… apparently without the responsibilities.

And now it’s only getting worse because I have the audacity to refuse to be put in danger with no consequence for those that don’t care.

I won’t be going to the police about Louis Michael Cseke though. Oh no. And I must publish that in fear he will try to intercept for no tangible reason, further placing me at risk.

I will be going to the police about Liana and Steven Joel Kerzner and report them for abusing and endangering a legally disabled mentally ill at-risk adult. And I don’t fuck the fuck around. I will be able to provide copious amounts of detail, evidence, timelines, and everything else that will display the veracity of my statements, not all of which have been shared.

It must stop.

So, to Liana, publicly and directly:

If you continue to place me in danger over your own pride and ego by saying things like what is featured here, I will go to the authorities. It won’t be about defamation or libel or slander. Oh no, we’re way past that.

You’ve gone way past that.

It will be for abuse and reckless endangerment of an at-risk adult, aggravated by clearly established depraved indifference.

One, last, fucking, time. Stop.

And everyone else?

People need to hear this. They don’t seem to hear it. They don’t comprehend it. They don’t believe it. And they should. I know it’s difficult to imagine and difficult to understand, but you see snippets of it on TV and on the Internet all the time, it’s just safely packaged as some outlandish story that you don’t have to truly worry about, just find fascinating.

And I’d love to be someone people find fascinating, but this isn’t safely packaged for me. It is my life, and I want to continue living it. Please, for the love of all that is humane,

SAY SOMETHING

CHALLENGE THIS SHIT.

MAKE A CONSTRUCTIVE CONTRIBUTION

I’m not asking anyone to harass anyone, please, don’t do that. I’m not asking for justice, vigilantism, or further harm by and towards anyone.

No. No. No.

I’m asking for people to stop caring without caring, and actually fucking care.

I don’t want this to go the way it went the last two times, which, was to sort out and accomplish nothing, only mock me further. In the end, things simply cooled down enough to make me worry a little bit less, because people in the shadows appeared to disengage, while I persisted in my pursuit to get restitution, which again, does not require consent, though I’ve refused, up until now, to do anything to enforce it.

I’m not some manufactured oversold sob story who plays up their mental illness as some form of deranged entertainment and activism. I do not think it makes me special, sexy, attractive, insightful, or is a superpower. All my condition has ever done in my life is hinder me and hurt me. This isn’t a fucking cosplay show, it’s not a game, and no one seems to understand that.

Maus can’t stop it if shit goes down.

No one can stop it if a domino effect occurs and I end up a ward of the state. They do not need to ask my mother, or my husband, they just do it and I lose almost all of my rights. I literally become a legal ward of the *government* to treat and manage as they please. Appeals by loved ones are limited. It is not an easy out.

I can end up in the state institution, which I’ve actively avoided my whole life. The state has been awarded custody of me before, briefly, and I did everything I could to get out of what ended up being an unethical facility.

This is very very real. Just because you can’t imagine it doesn’t mean it doesn’t happen. It just means you’re blessed with the privilege of never having to think about it. This isn’t a guilt tactic. I’m privileged in some ways too, but not in this way.

This last week has been the first time in 17 months I’ve actually felt relaxed, until I saw that screenshot above (because I’m not checking.)

I never say anything if it isn’t true.

I’m scared for fuck’s sake!

Goddamn.